Sunday, January 12, 2025

Installing Twist Throttles, Fixing Chains and Mini Mentoring

 

Collaboration and mentorship are a huge part of growing up, and something that even follows us into adulthood where we can learn more and experience new things. You know I love definitions so here you go. Collaboration is the act of working with someone to produce or create something, often involving a partnership or union.  Mentorship works closely with collaboration sometimes taking that partnership to the next level. Mentorship is the act of advising or training someone, most times a younger or less experienced person.  Mentorship is important for young people especially. I agree that a young person when having the knowledge an older person lacks, can also be of huge benefit to an older person. It is all based on upbringing, skills, and life experiences which can be unique to all and not bound by age.

As a mom raising a teenage boy without a father, having a mentor(s) for him is extremely important to me. There is something to be said about the people who have come into our lives both before and after Steve’s death. A friend of mine reiterated last week in a conversation we were having with Paxton at that time that some of these people are in our lives for a reason, season, or lifetime. I know I have blogged about this before. Not everyone that comes into our lives is here to stay forever. I am extremely blessed to have had strong men in Paxton’s life even if only for a period that have a wide variety of skills they share with him, not only does it give him insight into what he wants for the future but also gives him character from the experiences he has had. All of these men have different characteristics that benefit Paxton in many positive ways, and I believe essentially are what is going to shape him into the amazing adult that I know he has the potential to be. Obviously along with girl/women postitive influences as well!

I can’t think of anything that Steve would want more than his son to have all the positive influences that he can have to excel in his future and maybe even some of the bad, harder, or life teaching ones too. I remember when my dad died there were certain father figures that I found helped shape me into who I am now. As a girl I felt like the women in my life taught me how to be a better woman, but the men showed me what I was looking for in a future man, and life experiences have helped me find what I am looking for in my current partner life part 2. I want Paxton to not only have mentors that can be there to share their wisdom, life experiences, and insight to help shape him, I also want him to have someone  who is consistently there to guide him despite the life happenings that sometimes prevent the other mentors from being able to show up every time that he needs it, I am also equally grateful that he is called to be a mentor as well.

To be completely honest, when I met Mark, I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about a man with a kid who was so young, or how it would affect mine. Maxon was 5 when we met and just turned 7 last week, my son being a teenager I was closer to being done with those years and also didn't know how sharing my attention would go. Fast forward to the first time I met him, and I was hooked, and I would never second guess that thought again. God really knows what he is doing, and I decided to trust the process and surrendered the outcome.  I will say a year and half later, I couldn’t be more thrilled to have a man who consistently shows up in my son’s life and a son who wouldn’t think twice to be like a big brother mentor who he has always secretly wanted to be. (For years he begged Steve and I for a brother, this may not be exactly what he was thinking, but we don't always know what we are meant to have, until we do.) I know he doesn’t read my blogs, but one day down the road into adulthood if he ever does, I am pretty certain this won’t be a false statement.

It warms my heart that his big heart is drawn to teach as he has been taught and pass along his knowledge, skills, and kindness to others, especially Maxon who has so many influences yet to be exposed to and learning to be consumed and there will be a lot who contribute to who he becomes. Paxton might be a typical teenager who is going through one of the toughest and most influencial times in his life who also met the unfortunate circumstances of losing his dad at a young age. With both combined he tests me and drives me completely insane on the daily but also enhances who I am and who I am becoming, and I love him with my whole heart. I am truly proud of him and who he is becoming. Trusting the process, surrendering the outcome, is one of the most profound sayings in my life right now and probably always will be. I am grateful for all life experiences, the good and the bad, which both become a part of who we are. So, the next time you want to get down on yourself for what you are going through, remember it all works toward the outcome of who you are meant to be. Process it, grab your popcorn and stayed tuned for the ending… just kidding the journey is just getting started. Enjoy.

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