Tuesday, February 28, 2012

You define your own success

"Often the difference between a successful person and a failure is not one has better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on one's ideas, to take a calculated risk - and to act."

Maxwell Maltz
1899-1975, Author of Psyco-Cybernetics

Sometimes I think that even with the courage we need to take the action and where we often find the biggest hold up in taking the action is where to start? If not us, who can take or idea and make it reality? What resources can we use? who do we know? how can we network? these can all seem overwhelming steps to take if you are holding back on whether or not the outcome can truly work; can we be successful? Do we want to even try? What if I fail? What if I get so far and waste time, money and resources and nothing to show for it? What if I make promises that I cannot deliver and no one supports me?
I think no matter who you are at one time or another you have asked yourself similar questions, chucked your idea into the back of your mind and moved on with your every day tasks.
I know for a fact that stepping outside my comfort zone, going after one of my goals and continuing to strive to make it successful, has landed me a published book, now of course it is my effort and the willingness of others to buy it to make it popular and allow me to publish number two, move on to other writing goals and strive to touch other's in some way along the way. I cannot and will not sit back and wait for it to fall into my lap and become a popular author without some sort of effort on my part.
There are other ideas that I have that may or may not evolve into something quite as significant in my life, however I need to take the chance and try or I will never know my worth, so why do I still have reservations, why am I still questioning my other goals, ideas and desires?
Simply it is the human thing to do and we want to make sure we are using what skills and talents God has given us in the most constructive and useful way, and trying not to mess up, fail or waste our time, energy or the time and energy of others for something that will never turn out. Too bad none of us have that crystal ball where we can see into the future. Whether taking that chance will pan out or not, we just need to do a lot of praying, take the leap of faith if we are guided in that direction and deal with the consequences whether good or bad when they arise. We must find the positive in any negative situation. There is some reason beyond our understanding for those things that simply do not work out, no matter how hard we try, no matter how much effort we set forth, but something is gained from it in the long run if you look for it.
I was talking with a student today who was having a really hard time balancing her life, work and school obligations, she is in her last class and she needed to make a certain grade in order to graduate, she was ready to give up and throw in the towel. We have had several conversations over the past few months where she has promised herself and I that she was going to do what she needed to and once again had let herself down, the only way to get to her goal was to start the course all over again, which would waste time and money that she didn't have, but continuing on or quitting would not get her there either. I told her starting over may be just what she needs and maybe by doing this she will encounter some experience that she would never have had if she completed the first course successfully. We talked for awhile and she turned her way of thinking around to a more positive light. Before I left work today she sent a really nice email again thanking me for listening, letting her vent and giving her insight that she was just too upset with herself to recognize.
How often do I try to think the more positive thoughts from a difficult situation or frustration during the moment? How often d we are caught up in the heat or passion of a moment of intensity, sometimes it is hard for us to step outside ourselves and say what we know our friend/relative or someone from our support system would say to us. When I run late for something, I say it was my protection from a wreck or altercation on the way , if I just left a few minutes earlier, if I don't get a promotion, position that I think I am more than qualified for, there is something better out there suited just for me, If I work my tail off showing homes and a particular client doesn't end up buying, I think I learned something from that person or experience that will help me in the future that I wouldn't have had if I hadn't
Don't allow yourself to get caught up in all the things you don't want, can't have or negative things that stand in your way. Try, fail, try again, fail, try again, alter your pathway to your success. Success is defined as the accomplishment of your purpose, it is what you feel that success is, everyone may have a different definition associated with what they think makes someone successful, trust that your definition for you, is the right one.

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