The Courage to change the things you can

Sometimes in life we can not control our circumstances- we cannot change what happens to us, we can think life is unfair- we can have our pity parties or meltdowns and blow ups - but we must get over it and continue on. We must be thankful for what we have the good and the bad. Along with the ugly, the unfair, the heartaches and the pain, the love the joy the blessings and miracles. It is not our circumstances but how we react to, deal with and handle our situation. Can we turn our negative circumstances for a greater good with our attitude, our treatment of others, our kind words and selfless deeds? This is what shapes us to be who we are. I shared with a friend last night a few reasons why I have chosen to do certain things in my life - a huge percentage of them were from taking tragic events that have happened to me over the years and making them have a positive impact on my life now. Why do we do what we do? Because of what happens to us along the way. We as individuals have the choice to embrace change, negative circumstances, unfair events and tradegy and use them to produce positive results in our lives and in the lives of others. Don't let that thing that happens to you today sour the rest of your days enjoyment-or cause a negative chain of events due to altering your attitude to negative- have your fit and move on and enjoy the day to its fullest- you NEVER know when it may be your last. 

God Grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change the Courage to change the things I can and the Wisdom to know the difference. 

Addition and subtraction

It is a simple lesson of addition and subtraction- we all learned this in school. Do you ever feel like you have too many commitments? You can't say no. You want to be everything to everyone? As women we sure are multi-taskers but are we ever multi-tasking so much we forget where we are, what we are doing next or who we are? I have said in the past, the busier I am the more productive I am. At this point in my life I am beginning to think this isn't true. What I once could do I no longer have the capacity to handle. Especially with ever changing needs of my family, relationships and goals. When new opportunities arise I find myself just adding them to the laundry list of things I am already doing. I am committed to certain things already but I have an interest in others. So instead of re-evaluating what I am already doing, eliminating the things that are no longer in line with my goals and expectations of myself, my interests, likes and hobbies, I just pile them on top of what I am doing so that I don't have to "quit" or disappoint someone/something that I am presently a part of. This can be self-diagnosed as overly engaged in activities that no longer suit the needs of your current situation, to the point of a mid life crisis nervous breakdown because you are expecting to much of yourself in order to not look like you can't continue to handle everything that you have said yes to. Sometimes these opportunities and commitments you make are temporary, like the seasons, they change with the changes in your life. When your life changes, when unexpected things happen, when your needs, wants, desires and familial demands change, you must change- it is inevitable. You cannot continue to do all the things in your life you once had and cram in more, pile it on top, heavy load. You must STOP- Re-Evaluate- Prioritize- and LET GO! What is working for you and your situation, your goals? What do you want to accomplish? What commitments are in-line with your present? Your future? The past is the past. You CANNOT be every thing to everyone. Who is your focus? What is it that you want people to say about you at your funeral? "she sure was busy, but she lost her mind there at the end." LOL! Seriously! Sometimes you can only say YES so many times before it can really effect your livelihood and then you are just plain a mess inside with a happy go lucky outward appearance that is a ticking time bomb waiting to happen. In a conversation over the weekend with one of my friends, we discussed the negative effects of keeping things bottled inside and allowing others to take advantage of us without complaint because it is easier to go with the flow then speak up. But somehow that bottled up inside comes out and it isn't always pretty. My goal this week is to focus on the things that matter most, the ones most beneficial to my progress and livelihood and my current situation- those that don't are going to be eliminated- not because they haven't helped me in the past or aren't beneficial, but because I just cannot continue to add and not subtract.

Why I became a Realtor because I just wasn't cut out to be a Seamstress.... tales of a do it all mom.

So, that would be an awesome book title I thought to myself a few nights ago as it took me about an hour to sew a patch in Paxton's backpack with his name on it! I thought of the patches for his backpack lunch bag and several jackets he might wear this winter at the last minute and therefore the girl who made them for me did not have time to sew them in. I took sewing in seventh grade so why not? Right? I GOT THIS! 

As women and moms we are usually willing to and think that we are capable of doing EVERYTHING  that is needed. To work, to run our households, to pick up our children, to get them ready,to laundry ,dishes, cooking and everything else in between. We also feed animals mend boo-boos, look for solutions, fix problems, repair things- create things, shop for their needs, pay bills, make calls, straighten out problems- the list goes on and on. I'm sure we never feel inadequate when something doesn't turn out the way that we think it should we can't fit it into our schedule. Because we are SUPERMOM right??? 

Always busy always something to do always trying to remember the things we need to keep track of so we don't mess something up. I don't know how many times I felt guilty about things that I've forgotten or haven't done because I have so many other things I'm trying to remember. I'm sure I'm not the only mom who has forgotten a thing or two. I should feel great about the things that I am able to accomplish. Lower my own expectations of myself- take my time and cherish my blessings. 

 Yesterday was a great reminder of this. When you're responsible for living beings you take total responsibility when something goes wrong. Yesterday was a sad day at the Miller mini farm. It  was starting to storm last night so I told my son to stay inside when I went out to feed the animals. Good thing because when I went out past the goats and horse out to the chicken coop and I didn't see them fluttering around- my first thought was that they flew away and my second was that some animal had gotten a hold of them. In walking up to the chicken coop they were all dead inside. My heart sank aching for those chickens and my baby that I was going to have to tell all his chickens died. ( so far at 4 a crab and fish have been all he has lost)  I ran back as fast as I could up to the house but not to panic anyone but to grab my husband without my son knowing what was going on. 

Later that night we told Paxton about what happened the record-breaking like heat killed his chickens. He was devastated it was a very sad thing for a four-year-old. Toulage,  Lulu, Buttercup and Chip when no longer. I wondered how they made it through last summer and not this summer they had plenty of food water and shelter what went wrong? Was there something on the cantaloupe they ate? Did someone poison them? The more I researched and the more I read online last night I realized the one thing I can admit that we did last year that we didn't this year- freeze water bottles and put them in their water so that the water remains cool. In researching last night the hotter the water gets the less they drink and then stop drinking so much in extreme temperatures can cause sudden heatstroke. I would love to say it's a lesson learned however it cost four lives. As a mom that is super heartbreaking because I could've prevented it. 

Will I beat myself up over it probably for a little-  I'm only human. 

But just as I am a real estate agent because I'm good at it and passionate about helping others and I didn't choose to become a seamstress because I wasn't interested and I'm not good at it it doesn't fulfill me- my sew job that I should have given someone else to do was poor but adequate-

 I have to learn to give the jobs that I'm not very good at to others so that I don't lack in areas that are most important like taking care of living beings that I am responsible for. Did my chickens have food and water yes- but I failed to provide accurate Cool water in which to serve them best which resulted in their death. 

Prioritize was my lesson learned. Stay informed. Do everything you can to protect those you love. Be prepared. Just because you're providing something doesn't necessarily mean it's the right thing. Just because you can do something doesn't mean you should take it all on or do it half-assed. 

Nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely. - Auguste Rodin

What are you good at? What you need to get better at? What things can you find that others are good at to use to your advantage to have more times for the things that you can do? What responsibilities can you delegate so it's not all on your plate that things go wrong more often because you're overloaded? Make a list today. No one can change you only you can change yourself. 

Start now. 

Melted ice cream

My experience at Walmart yesterday was more than crazy.   I set out to have a successful price matching grocery shopping trip at Walmart yesterday to get ready for the week. Yes I'm one of those people. My son starts first day of kindergarten on Monday and I wanted to have all of the snacks and necessities to be prepared.  I had a huge list I also had my moms grocery list as well as some stuff I need for my business. That's already three transactions right there. All-in-one cart and definitely not as organized by the time I got to the register as when I started. Once in a while I think they definitely need bigger carts at Walmart. They have bigger carts at Home Depot why be discriminating at Walmart. Lol. 

Usually I despise shopping on a Sunday because of all the people that are there and They are normally out of stuff because their shipments coming on Monday and then I get frustrated! So I figured Saturday midmorning might be a good time. Boy was I wrong the place is crawling with people and the lines were long and atrocious. Not to mention I had ice cream in my cart. 

Don't get me wrong there are plenty of lanes open there were just a lot of people. I picked a lane that had three people in front of me. When I got in line I had an agent call on a listing that I had for details. As I was talking to him a clerk came over and asked me if I wanted to switch lanes. She took me down to 15 they said they just opened. There was one lady in front of me with very few groceries so I was happy. 

They had no dividers so I kind had to hold my stuff back so he didn't get confused and charge her for it. Remember I had three transactions! I got to the first transaction which was some ink and notecards that I could use as a business expense and pay with my business chargecard. Transaction smooth. 

As I pulled out the stuff for my mom's transaction and put it on the conveyor belt the gentleman was scanning her things- when I got to the fruit that she wanted he said "uh oh." 

Thought to myself uh oh what? Really? 

"Um ma'am our scale doesn't work for weighing the fruit." 

Definitely not what I want to do here in the middle of a transaction with a whole conveyor belt with all of my own groceries of fruits and vegetables needing to be weighed and two containers of ice cream sitting there melting.

 I had to to stop at my moms in San Tan Valley and drive to Florence where I live and guess what one minor detail I forgot to bring a cooler to keep the ice cream cold. Ah, that could be a problem when it is 104 outside. 

Yeah- I proceeded to tell the guy I wasn't getting back in a big long line and having melted ice cream and starting all over to purchase groceries, I am sure with a little irritation in my voice. 

I paid for what he rang up put the rest of the groceries from the conveyor belt back into my cart and found the manager. 

She proceeded to go to lane 15 and let the guy know that 15 was one of the ones on the alerts that they get a list saying it wasn't working. He looked at her like a deer in headlights. She seemed irritated that he opened that Register he seemed irritated that he didn't know. Communication is key people!

 There were lots of people behind me in line so they all had to get out and find new location. In the mist of all that I forgot to price match the stuff that my mom was getting that needed price matching is well. Total lost $2.58. 

The manager took me to another register where I proceeded to price match my own things and bring up the rest of my groceries- she flagged down a girl to go get new ice cream so that it was better and more frozen then what was already in my cart. Nice move. Go customer service! 

As we proceeded to get further into the transaction she realized that the debit card swiper on that particular system wasn't working. Ummm. are you kidding me? Somehow I'm being tested here. 

- i'm sure the lady thought wow is this lady going to explode or is she going to remain calm? I wasn't quite sure myself if I figured that out yet or not? Lol. I took a deep breath and dug through my purse and found a business checkbook with 1 check left.  Not that I wanted to pay for my groceries out of my business account- the last thing I wanted to do was put everything back in my cart and go to a new register for the forth time. So I made an exception. 

I said I would just pay with my business check and I can pay myself back when I get home- she looked relieved. 

She also said that I could go to customer service and get my $2.58 back from my moms transaction.  Another manager came over and authorized her to void and re-ring the transaction for my mom so that she could price match and give me the $2.58 back.  I proceeded to ask her how that would work and she told me, it seemed more complicated than it was worth and I thought it would take way too long. 

Mind you I just got new frozen ice cream-  however I was done. I just said you guys can keep your $2.58 and have a nice day.  She said are you sure? I said I hope your day gets better thanks- and walked away. 

I definitely could've blew my stack threw a fit got frustrated spoke to a manager complained complained complained. I chose right then and there to let it go.  I think that getting pissed would've taken a lot more of my energy than it was worth- and guess what shit happens! 

So next time you think you're going to get frustrated over some matter that's small or menial in the long run just ask yourself is it really worth it, or will it be better to just chalk it up to a crappy experience and move on??? You can chose. 

James 1:19. This you know my beloved, but everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger. 

Speak to your Kids

I just go back from a stellar Unleash the Power Within Seminar hosted by Tony Robbins. What an Amazing Guy using the Amazing gifts God has given him. Before I left my son asked me why I was going and had to be gone for 4 days. I explained to him that I was leaving to come back a better mother, wife, daughter (relationships) and business person. He said ok, cried a little...I promised my little guy a gift if he would let mommy go and explore her potential. The first day I was gone he talked to me about 4 times, the second day 2, the 3rd day 1 of which he said " Can you talk to dad now" I know that he can survive without me, but I sure did miss him while I was away. Coming home with my new found attitude, after delving into my limiting beliefs and what over the years has cause me not only these false beliefs about myself but a lot of why I do what I do and how I can chose to change that. It was an amazing adventure and I am truly grateful that I had the opportunity to go. I can't even describe all the emotions and discoveries I made. Each individual who attends I am sure brings something back to their normal life that is individual to them. It is up to each individual to CHOOSE to incorporate it into their life. When I got back my son was already asleep. Upon waking, as he remembered mommy was bring a gift- he sprung into my bedroom and the first thing out of his mouth was not "mommy I missed you, mommy I am glad you are home" but like most little kids it was "where is my gift?" LOL! He definitely wasn't going to let that memory escape him. Since I had only seen the inside of an airport, cab, hotel and convention center, I settled for the toy southwest airplane at the airport gift shop, he was pleased! He said, "Oh thank you mommy." The first day back I had a fully loaded schedule and didn't get the amount of time with my son as I would have liked to upon coming back. He said "that is okay mommy, we can spend time together tomorrow." - after a little bit of whine. I was truly grateful for his little positive reinforcement. Then yesterday as we spent most of the day together, he continually asked for more and more things as we went different places. He asked for every toy, grocery, sweet, snack and thing you could possibly imagine. Mommy wasn't about to buy him everything he "needed" just because she was gone for 4 days. So repeatedly I told him NO, he didn't need a certain thing, NO he didn't need sweets today, NO he could wait until his birthday in September and I reminded him I brought him a gift. Throwing a little attitude in the car he shouted, "I thought you said you were coming back a better mommy?" Whoaa... that got me. I had to ask what his idea of a good mommy was? He thought for a moment and stumble with his words. I said, "do you think being a good mommy means I give you everything you want?" He replied "yes." In this come to Jesus moment I was having I had to think quick as to how to respond lovingly yet with a lesson about how life is not about getting everything you want. Sometimes it is about the stuff you don't get that allows to shape you into the person you are, the circumstances that happen to you that change your life, to become better at something, to change, to realize your gratitude for the things you do have. I stopped and asked him to tell me 3 things he was grateful for right now. (this is a practice we do every night before bed as a family but we only each say 1 thing for the day.) He says to me, "Mom, we say that at night, it isn't nighttime." I answered back and told him that he should be grateful for what he has throughout the whole day, if he is constantly thinking and appreciating throughout the day, his day would be more enriched with what is going on in his life. He said, " my animals, that I get to play, and spending time with me." That last one really made me, as a mom, feel better about the situation and his selfishness of this day. You see it isn't about what we get or what we have or how much money we make. Some people make all the money in the world and are still unhappy, miserable or not satisfied. It is about what we already have, the relationships we make and the story we build every day that we should be most happy about. When we die we cannot take our money or possessions with us. What would everyone say about you if you died tomorrow? What would your kids say? "Mommy bought me a lot of stuff? or my mommy taught me to be kind, patient, loving and grateful, just as she was." Be an example to your children, your family and friends, because when you die what you did and what you said and the memories you made is what they will remember. Chose to have them remember the good. One of my favorites: Psalms 118:24 This is the day which the LORD has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.

Not wrapped in a package.

The best Mother's Day gift doesn't come wrapped in a shiny package with a beautiful bow. This morning I got a cute puppy card from my son. His "Mommy" handwriting on the outside envelope, and his Paxton signature inside. With a little help from his daddy interviewing him I received a heartfelt message of why he was thankful for his Mommy. With tears in my eyes for my hubby's creativity and my son's thoughts I was Grateful for it is the most precious gift I could receive from a 4 year old. A thank you from your children comes in the words and actions of the one who calls you mom. That special person that you have created,  loved and spent countless hours giving your time to. When they smile, give back, help others, show a display of something great you taught them. That is what really matters. The package gift or momento may outlive me as a mother but the person they are the person they will become is partially because of me. As a mom(or someone who is acting as mom)  be the best example you can be- give freely- complain less- let them find themselves with your help of course - find your common ground with one another- but be greatful everyday for all they have to offer in return no matter how small. It is priceless. 

Take the extra 2 minutes!

Sometimes in the hustle and bustle of things it's easy to get upset about little situations that occur to take more of my time or make me frustrated. Time is precious and sometimes we try to shove too many things in a day. Therefore when things don't go exactly as we think they should occur we often lose sight of overdoing in the first place-the why behind it. Reading my devotional this morning there's always a why behind something-that motivation the drive that causes us to be doing it. My son gets really excited when he can help- at four sometimes it can be frustrating to me especially when I'm in a hurry-everything he does takes just a little bit longer and is pokey to boot! Last night when feeding the animals he wanted to do it all by himself. This shows great interest by him but sometimes I lose sight of what he were trying to accomplish. My husband and I are trying to teach him responsibility and chores- right now he's at the most influential age because he's willing to want to help. I need to realize if we want to keep him interested in helping we need to have more patience when he's helping. He is four not in his 30s. His concept of time and "quick" is not necessarily fully developed! I did let him feed all the animals by himself but he did take up more of my time , and I definitely had to bite my tongue to say anything even though I had other stuff to do. This morning when making coffee and he wanted to help I realized as the coffee grounds were spilled all over the counter that getting upset now at four when He is most willing to help out might just push him to not help as he gets older. Therefore my advice to you as parents is to be as patient as possible let children learn on their own how to do things in their own time and own way don't get upset with the way that they are doing them now at the younger ages because it may just influence them in their attitudes when older. Bite your tongue let them get praised for being helpful and spend that extra two-five minutes it might take now cleaning up their mess when trying to help to have them develop into good and responsible adults once older. -dani

When in doubt LOOK UP!

The past few weeks have been a little overwhelming for me, hectic to say the least. I will spare you all the details of what has been going on, some good, some not so good and some really frustrating moments. This is when I start to have an inner struggle and things come out in frustration that may hurt others, because I am on overload, I may start to become UNGLUED! Not even thinking about what it is I say or how I react is sometimes a problem for me. I try as I might to carry the weight of my family, life and the all my clients on my shoulders. This I know that I shouldn't do but sometimes it is so hard to allow myself this forgiveness for not being able to do or get to everything. Sometimes I get an idea in my head and want what I want when I want it. I have lived in my home almost 12 years and trying to change or spruce up rooms without having to completely re-do the whole thing for mostly a time and cost effective reason... I decided the rug in our family room is in need of a big fat dumpster. Even after multiple cleanings with two big dogs and a kid it has seen better days! I have been looking for several months and finally decided to go to a store where some friends of ours said they got a real good deal on a rug. I had a hour to waste in between clients a few days ago so I went to check out their goods. I took several pictures of rugs and brought them home to show Steve. We picked one out. I went the next day in between appointments again. Unfortunately the one I set my heart on was out of stock and not available until March. SERIOUSLY! March? I NEED it before Sunday's Super Bowl party. With limited time the salesman and I looked through several other rugs and I picked out a couple more. I was leaning more toward one than another however I wanted to again check with Steve. I also bought flowers and a picture at Hobby Lobby to go with my new rug, that I could not have! Too funny! But the other two rugs did have some of the same colors. When I got home I knew I had a vase for the new flowers, which I wanted to arrange right away- Remember, I am creating my own sense of urgency which is just causing me more frustration! And the vase which of course I could NOT find. Really, go figure, because I wanted it right now! Needless to say I did get frustrated but had to leave to go to another appointment. After getting in a heated argument with my mom over something I honestly today can't remember, sometimes we do that. I am glad I have her to vent, forgive and forget. However, I probably should practice asking for permission to vent first which just properly sets her up for my rant because I doubt she would ever tell me NO she doesn't have time to listen. It is just the polite thing to do. Anyhow.. after a long day of frustration, closings, errands, multiple people pulling me in different directions, not feeling that I got to everything that I needed to, feeling guilty about not being home 3 nights in a row for dinner... I made it to bed allowing myself to realize that tomorrow is a great day to start again. When I woke up this morning I read my bible and daily devotional... (hmmm which I did not do the morning before), headed to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee I went to the pantry to shut the door which had been opened and there in the corner of the very top shelf was the vase that I had been looking for. My advise for you today is to be patient if you don't get what you want right when you want it, they may be a lesson in progress, WHEN IN DOUBT- LOOK UP! God blesses the people who patiently endure testing, afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. - James 1:12 NLT

Don't judge a Soup by it's Title

Sitting at lunch with some friends yesterday in Show Low it was chilly and soup sounded so good. I had my heart set on soup and salad bar and when I asked the waitress what their soup of the day was, she immediately responded beef and potato. My first reaction was to curl up my nose and make a sort of "really" face. Which I know she totally went in the kitchen and mentioned! Not sure why I reacted in such a way, I am really not sure what I was hoping she would say. I associated beef broth, some chunks of meat, a few potatoes and some really big thick onions. Not really what I was craving, even though I wasn't sure what I was craving. Long story short the soup ended up being more like a roast that my mom used to make in the electric skillet, thick with beef chunks, potatoes (hers had carrots), we used to soak up the juice with buttered bread, YUM! Contrary to my initial reaction it was so good I had to request my mom to make her roast this week- I now can't wait. I even pointed out to the waitress before we left that the soup was far beyond what I imagined and really good. So I try not to be a very judgmental person. Whether it is judging people or things. EXCEPTION ALERT! I am very judgmental when it comes to books- If the cover doesn't have it, I have no interest! Probably not the best way to judge a book by its cover, but I do! You never know about a person or a thing until you really get to know or try it out. You never know what will transpire from trying something for the first time, learning a new skill, meeting a new person who you can build a lasting relationship with, or help you somehow progress in areas you need developing! Just remember next time you curl up your nose at a new thought, idea, person or suggestion, be open to the possibilities of what may develop from it, and try it! I did and it was amazingly good. This is something we teach our children on a daily basis, if you try it and don't like it don't have more, if you try it and you fail, at least you know you tried, you never know what may be amazing!

Sparkle

As I continue to receive updates regarding my friend's cancer that has crept back into her life after almost 4 years free- a mom of two beautiful girls, a wife to a very loving supportive husband, a daughter, a sister, a friend, I feel like I have to HOPE for my future by living in my present. By enjoying what I have and what I am blessed with every single day. Disaster, depression, disease, anxiety, worry, death and grief can come into our lives quicker than we can blink an eye. They say that troubles in our lives can come and go. It is how we chose to deal with those troubles not the troubles themselves that really define us as a person. Trouble is a tunnel through which we pass and not a brick wall against which we must break our heads. - Claire Weeks Yesterday marked the 23rd year anniversary of the death of my best friend growing up of 10 years. We grew up across the street from one another, inseparable at times. She was diagnosed with brain cancer at a very young age. I always looked at her as a great example of a fearless person. Even though I never knew what was truly going on inside her as we were so young. She died at only 10. Looking back she was just so full of life, of love of compassion for others. Her silliness, happiness and lack of complaining even though she struggled every day to hang onto her life, shows me that through the little hiccups in my life I must keep going, I must be positive and I must carry on her legacy of touching others in a positive way every day. Count your blessings, be aware of the good stuff in your life. Let the frustrations, little burdens and unwanted actions of others, pass you by. Make an effort to see the upside of any and every unwanted situation and try to turn it around to be positive, don't compare your life to others, you never know what is going on behind closed doors, practice acts of kindness not only toward friends but complete strangers, a simple smile can go a long way. Don't take your loved ones for granted, they may not be here tomorrow, Stay active, be engaged, do things that make you happy. Savor life, write things down, take pictures. Make goals, take steps, commit and pursue them. Forgive others, let go of hurts, put the past behind you. Find something funny to laugh at every day, laughter is good medicine, laughter heals, laughter brings people together. God blesses the people who patiently endure testing, Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. - James 1:12 NLT Dear God, help me to focus on you when I struggle, help me to remember to stop and pray for my blessings and to know that anything I am faced with is little compared to what others may be going through and that with your help I will maintain stamina and move on past my fears, my temptations and my fits. Help me to Sparkle and be an example to others of what a strong, happy and positive person can overcome.

Beyond Anxiety

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. - Philippians 4:6 It was brought to my attention yesterday that a dear friend of mine, although thousands of miles apart, is in a fight for her life. How many of us can say our worry for tomorrow is truly life-threatening? No one has ever changed the future by dreading it. Leaving it up to God, we are so much better off. Living life to the fullest. Staying away from becoming a victim. I recently read a book called The Law of the Garbage Truck by David J. Pollay. In chapter 27 he tells a story about a lady named Kim, married with 2 young children. She was diagnosed with cancer, it went away and came back in other places a few years later. He talks about how she flourished despite her set back, despite her worry, despite her bad news, despite her fear of the unknown, of who would care for her children if she were to leave this world. That is what kept her going and focused on staying positive, keeping her sense of humor and ability to switch from sadness to gratitude on a dime! In situations like cancer there is something in our life beyond our control, we must be reminded to look for the greater things, to not let this disease dump on the person dealing with it or us as a family member, don't focus on the bad, focus on the good and greater things in our lives, you cannot afford to waste your energy on negative distractions. In the words of Kim- We all have issues, it is not isolated just to someone with cancer. It's easy to see the world through your own filter of "Oh my goodness, I'm dealing with cancer." The reality is that everybody's dealing with something that they feel is very important in their lives. And who is ultimately the judge. Which is worse? There is no competition. I wonder what tomorrow will hold. I know that I have amazing people in my life and that I am in great hands medically. By letting go of (most) of the fear and living my life with appreciation for everything I have- my husband, my children, my family and friends- I am a happy, grateful, pro-active survivor. Growing up I had a friend who passed away from brain cancer when I was just 11 years old. She was 10. We grew up together, like sisters, right across the street. Always at each others side. She was an inspiration to me. A positive bubble of energy, or happiness and gratitude no matter what she was going through. She was a light to other people. I learned from her early on that no matter what life throws my way, no matter what obstacles or set backs, I can be sad a little, I can be mad a little, I can grieve and be a victim but only for a short period of time, before I need to pick myself up, dust myself off and push forward. My friend now struggling with this almost 4 year remission of cancer to find out that she now has it in more than one location of her body is saddening. Reading her post was heartbreaking. I just saw her in October and she was so full of life and love and happiness! Her and her husband just recently took her experience and turned it into a positive, opening up a cancer resource center in their local town, trying to give back to those who fall victim to this devastating disease, to use her energy and her experience to show those around her that you can survive and how to survive through this ordeal. I am so proud of her and her accomplishments. It is easy to get mad at God sometimes in these situations and ask "WHY?" "WHY her God?" She is trying to help others. unfortunately, I don't think it is for us to understand the "why" sometimes. I truly believe God doesn't cause things to happen in our lives but sometimes he doesn't intercede. Maybe she needs to go through all of this again for those people that she has opened her heart and her center to truly relate and see how actively positive she can remain, we may just never know. I do want anyone reading this to please keep her and her family in your prayers. There will be lots of doubt, fear and stress, it is humanly natural, however I pray that their hope for the future, their positive attitudes and their appreciation of what is around them and their blessings will sustain. Take this today as a reminder to always be focused on how you can be appreciative in your life. How you can take your sour attitude toward something that just isn't quite going your way and flip it on a dime to a happier moment! Life may bring you lemons, but you can make lemonade! Sometimes the very essence of faith is trusting God in the midst of things. He knows good and well we cannot comprehend. - Beth Moore