Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Back to school Anxiety for Moms




I think the only thing routine in my life is my morning coffee- and I have even shaken that up a time or 2 giving it up for Lent. I don't feed my animals at the same time everyday, I don't do laundry or clean my house on the same day every week...The point I am making is that I love when things change, I can do anything that I need to do if required, I am adaptable, but I am not a huge fan of routine, I like spontaneity, I like accommodating last minute changes, I crave new things, new experiences and meeting new people!
When the market was horrible and I took a 3 year job that required my same day punch in and out… I got stir crazy, I was unhappy sitting in the same desk and I did everything I could think of to go back to my unpredictable, every changing world of Real Estate and I haven’t looked back. In a nutshell I probably would have been diagnosed with ADHD as a child- but as an adult I can use it to my benefit. I can move from one project to the next and back and I always seem to get things done on time no matter if I procrastinate.  I love to be busy, I love challenges and I am not a routine person. I don't sit still for very long very well, I am honestly shocked that I can enjoy a whole movie at one time. I don't have any particular tv series I follow, I change my hair color often, and when I try something new and get bored I move on without hesitation. Probably why I don’t stick to any work out or eating plans… I get bored, EASILY! That is why real estate is definitely right for me… not predicable, always changing, every situation is different, even situations that are similar have different outcomes- I love balancing different deals, different people and different circumstances. I am constantly working with different personalities! I LOVE it, it keeps me on my toes and I am still helping people, which I truly believe is what I am called to do, Serve Others!
So this year, when I didn’t have a role as a PTA board member anymore, I didn’t have any deadlines to meet, I didn’t have the commitment to get things ready for the beginning of school, or be there to sell things at Meet the Teacher or the first day of school meet and greet… I was not prepared or motivated to get started and honestly didn't even go to meet the teacher, School gives me anxiety! Contrary to popular belief, even though I did well in school somewhat because I was smart and somewhat because the stuff I didn’t get I made a point to do well so I didn’t disappoint myself. School gives me anxiety for my kid as well.
Every year I hear the moms and parents talk about how they can’t wait until their kids go back to school, some are pulling their hair out even before our already short summer is over. I am over here praying that the summer isn’t over, I hate the routine. I love having my kid home! The anxiety of getting Paxton up on time, having to get him to school on time, stressing over getting him to brush his teeth, what is for breakfast, what is for lunch and to get his shoes on and making it out the door without forgetting something- and if I have an appointment early getting myself ready, the animals fed and doing things around the house if need be. Knowing I only have so many hours before he has to be picked back up and trying to fit everything in between. Finding somewhere for him to go if I won't make it home  It totally stresses me out! Some of you are probably thinking I am a crazy person, but I would rather have him home and take him with me wherever I need to go, which most of the time I can.
75% of my life is mostly made up of me making my own schedule, being flexible for clients, having to change things to accommodate others and not really sticking to a set schedule…Believe me, I work hard and most people don’t even see what goes into real estate behind the scenes- but a lot of it I can do when I want, where I want which doesn’t work for everyone but it works for me. So yes, I am that mom that gets anxiety when I must go back to a routine like my kid going back to school…
I know he already hates school and trying to shelter him from my anxiety really doesn’t work. I am not good at hiding my emotions and sometimes my lack of excitement for routine and his resistance to wanting to go to school clash and cause unwarranted arguments, and maybe even yelling before school! This sucks and just causes more anxiety! 
This school year my goal will be to take my mom’s advise of taking 3 deep breaths before reacting, trying to remain calm that I am not going to get my kid to like school no matter how hard I try to get him to see the value, so I may as well just stress less, go with the morning flow and find the positive in my struggles and my anxiety of being late or running behind, because in 5 years  we have never been late even once. 

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