Saturday, August 3, 2019

Sink or Swim, I'm Diving In.


Hey guys I did a thing this week I decided to finally take control of my life and do something for me. For years I’ve used taking care of others as a coping mechanism for all the different things that I’ve experienced in my life the heartache, the pain, the tragedies- the stress. Somehow taking care of others not only makes me feel like I’m serving God’s people it also helps me defer the problems and issues that I have. But over the years I have allowed it to come first before taking care of myself. All of us know that if we don’t take care of our self first we don’t really have the strength to take care of others not to full capacity at least !There’s so many stories you hear of people taking care of others not taking care of themselves and they end up dying because they didn’t know there was something wrong with them. How awful! And sometimes they die before the person they were taking care of. 
Last week I went to the dermatologist for a check up. It really sunk in with me after them telling me that my skin was healthy but the one thing that stood out was when the nurse asked me what medications I was on. Besides a vitamin for cellular health I take that my cousin recommended a few years ago and the occasional Tylenol and Sudafed, I don’t take any prescriptions at all. This is the second time I’ve been to the doctor recently that has asked me that question and the look on the face of both was a little bewilderment. Actually this nurse asked me twice just to confirm I think that I didn’t forget to mention something. Leaving that office it sunk in knowing that both my parents died young at 54 (at 14) and 66 (at 35) 20 something years apart from each other- That my goal is too far exceed their longevity. As a 40-year-old woman there is no better time than now to start taking care of myself. To let go of all the excuses as to why my career, my family, my household/farm chores and my community come before I take care of myself. Why I can’t work out or take a few extra minutes to make that better food choice! 
Guys I’m not talking about becoming selfish. I’m talking about caring for my body that God gave me to take care of on this earth so that I can carry out what I am here to do in the best way possible. This will allow me to take better care of everyone else which service to God is my passion. I love helping others! 
I’ll be the first to admit that even though I am the one in charge and I know what to do I needed a little help. This week I went to see a master nutritionist who is going to help me get myself back on track. I’ve had a lot of heartache and pain in my life and eating not only because A- I love to cook and B I love to eat I eat when I’m stressed or as a coping mechanism food is good and my schedule can be less than predictable sometimes. I’ll be the first to admit my routine sucks. I’ve never been a huge person who loves routine. And honestly that’s why I chose to be an entrepreneur and not work for someone else. I definitely don’t like those constraints. I love the unknown I love the last minute and I crave new things and situations. 
After last winter of putting in a $40,000 pool and I’ll admit to you this I am not ashamed of how much it cost because I worked hard for it! It is something that I wanted my son and his friends to be able to enjoy for years to come. But why stop there. Why can't I enjoy it! After years of swimming on a team in junior high and high school and a little bit of casual swimming in college, pools became less and less accessible the older I got and the more responsibility I had the harder it was to find the time. But you know what I love to swim and what better exercise to get then something that you enjoy doing. Besides a few late nights with Paxton messing around and swimming a few laps I haven’t “swam” in years! My boys went fishing this morning, I grabbed my Speedo goggles I bought just for me, my cheap Walmart 1 piece bathing suit (I may need to go shopping soon) and a towel. I set my timer, turned on some tunes and dove in swimming for 30 mins straight... I may be regretting it in the morning. (I’ll keep you posted) But I did it for me. And you know what it couldn’t have come at a better time! It reminded me of how much I love it, I miss it and I think I can make it a habit again. 
40 is the new 20 right? 
In the words of Steven Curtis Chapman 
“Sink or swim I’m diving in. “

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