Breaking Down but Human

Sometimes we have our moments when things just get a little too overwhelming. One thing after another after another in a short period of time and SNAP! I always worry that I might someday truly snap and do something that I can never reverse. Saying wrongful things, being mean beyond the forgiving point or just plain screwing up so bad there is no going back. Yet every time I tell myself to slow down, to take things one step at a time, to not let every one else's expectations of me control my pattern and my mood- I bounce back into that same routine. Sometimes you just want someone to tell you what is happening is normal, your feelings are normal, freaking out is normal- You just can't park yourself there. You must develop healthy coping strategies, if you don't have one. Pray, call a friend, take deep breaths, listen to music, walk-away from the situation, close your eyes (not recommended while driving). I found myself looking to call a friend yesterday, not for praise that I am a good person, but for reassurance that I am normal and my feelings, thoughts and frustrations are normal and that my freak out moment would go away and not define me, however, that person no longer being here that I wanted to call, lead me to first eat a lot ( which is a horrible coping mechanism, that I don't recommend, but an old standby), I decided to write down exactly what I thought she would tell me. This I did and was able to realize that she didn't have all the answers either, she was just a normal person like me who had experiences and moments to share. It is okay to have that freak out moment, to cry, to get angry. Just don't stay there, get the toxic thoughts out, the frustrations settled down and move on with the greater things in your life. Don't wait for something good to happen next to be happy, create your happy!