Waking up this morning to good news with another happy seller receiving an offer on their home always makes for a good start to the day, even on days when the sadness creeps in. This day every year is somber in the fact that my dad left us to go walk the streets of gold, only 2 short months after they found his cancer. I will always replay that day in my head, at the hospital, with my mom, my godmother and my brother. The powerful experience of watching my dad go to Heaven. Without that experience, without the presence of the spirit I felt on that day, I may have not gotten through the last 20 years still a Believer. I am not saying I do not have my moments or days of doubt when things get sticky- but I always fall back on my beliefs. From that day forward Believe was my most favorite saying. Believe in Yourself, Believe in Your Abilities, Believe in others, Believe things will get better, Believe in forgiveness, Believe in God, Believe in what is to come, I could type on and on. One of these days I will have that tattooed on me somewhere. I will never be able to have those years back, but I will be able to always bask in my memories. Most of us find it surprisingly easy to take for granted the gift of life. With recent tragic events in my own little town, ( a 2 year old drowning in a pool, a 16 year old recklessly driving and flipping a golf cart, a military young man who just came back from tour who died in a motorcycle accident) lives shortened that were never announced or expected, it makes you wonder how prepared is the world around you if you were no longer here tomorrow. Did you make a good impact? Did you take good care of those people? Did you find happiness in the little things? Did you stop your day to take inventory and appreciate those things around you? We should all take inventory on the blessings in our life. You add value to people when you value them. -John Maxwell. Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are. Marianne Williamson It is too often we get caught up in the rat race of this world, all the expectations that we have for ourselves coupled by those who expect from us that we forget to be grateful for what we already have, enjoy the people that we value, and count our blessings. Before you know it something could be taken from you that you really thought would always be there. Did I ever anticipate losing my father as a freshman in high school? Did I ever even consider at that young age that he would never be at my side for my first dance, my first date, my high school or college graduation, my wedding, or the birth of his grandson? The thought NEVER crossed my mind. Do I know that he was there for me in spirit, I do BELIEVE he is. Do I Believe he knew how much I cared and appreciated him. I do. I talk to him a lot. He doesn't answer me back, but I feel he is proud of what I have accomplished of what I am doing in my life. Knowing that I want to continue to make him proud I try my hardest every day to be the best person that I can, to succeed in my endeavors, to put my family first, to be kind and gentle to everyone. I know sometimes it is a struggle, I am only human, but I don't want to disappoint him, I want him to continue to be proud even if I can only feel it. As I sit here writing with tears streaming down my face, even 20 years later I thank him for developing me into who I am today. Would I be a different person if he was still here is hard to say and not something I want to even consider going back for. I am who I am today because of my circumstances. You cannot always change your circumstances but you can change yourself, your attitude and your reactions to those circumstances. You can allow yourself to be knocked down and stay down, or you can climb right back up and try again. It is in your control who you want to be, what your next move is and whether you are happy or not. don't forget you are worth having everything you love. Love yourself. Be not faithless, but believing. -John 20:27 From the inscription on the grave- Love one another as I have loved you, -John 15:12
Thank you Daddy for the memories, for bringing me to this earth to make a difference and for helping me to keep BELIEVING that I have a purpose. Happy 20th Birthday in Heaven. I carry this card with me every where I go as a constant reminder that if I just be myself, I can be and do anything I set my heart out for, because I am loved.
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
The card in my pocket
Waking up this morning to good news with another happy seller receiving an offer on their home always makes for a good start to the day, even on days when the sadness creeps in. This day every year is somber in the fact that my dad left us to go walk the streets of gold, only 2 short months after they found his cancer. I will always replay that day in my head, at the hospital, with my mom, my godmother and my brother. The powerful experience of watching my dad go to Heaven. Without that experience, without the presence of the spirit I felt on that day, I may have not gotten through the last 20 years still a Believer. I am not saying I do not have my moments or days of doubt when things get sticky- but I always fall back on my beliefs. From that day forward Believe was my most favorite saying. Believe in Yourself, Believe in Your Abilities, Believe in others, Believe things will get better, Believe in forgiveness, Believe in God, Believe in what is to come, I could type on and on. One of these days I will have that tattooed on me somewhere. I will never be able to have those years back, but I will be able to always bask in my memories. Most of us find it surprisingly easy to take for granted the gift of life. With recent tragic events in my own little town, ( a 2 year old drowning in a pool, a 16 year old recklessly driving and flipping a golf cart, a military young man who just came back from tour who died in a motorcycle accident) lives shortened that were never announced or expected, it makes you wonder how prepared is the world around you if you were no longer here tomorrow. Did you make a good impact? Did you take good care of those people? Did you find happiness in the little things? Did you stop your day to take inventory and appreciate those things around you? We should all take inventory on the blessings in our life. You add value to people when you value them. -John Maxwell. Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are. Marianne Williamson It is too often we get caught up in the rat race of this world, all the expectations that we have for ourselves coupled by those who expect from us that we forget to be grateful for what we already have, enjoy the people that we value, and count our blessings. Before you know it something could be taken from you that you really thought would always be there. Did I ever anticipate losing my father as a freshman in high school? Did I ever even consider at that young age that he would never be at my side for my first dance, my first date, my high school or college graduation, my wedding, or the birth of his grandson? The thought NEVER crossed my mind. Do I know that he was there for me in spirit, I do BELIEVE he is. Do I Believe he knew how much I cared and appreciated him. I do. I talk to him a lot. He doesn't answer me back, but I feel he is proud of what I have accomplished of what I am doing in my life. Knowing that I want to continue to make him proud I try my hardest every day to be the best person that I can, to succeed in my endeavors, to put my family first, to be kind and gentle to everyone. I know sometimes it is a struggle, I am only human, but I don't want to disappoint him, I want him to continue to be proud even if I can only feel it. As I sit here writing with tears streaming down my face, even 20 years later I thank him for developing me into who I am today. Would I be a different person if he was still here is hard to say and not something I want to even consider going back for. I am who I am today because of my circumstances. You cannot always change your circumstances but you can change yourself, your attitude and your reactions to those circumstances. You can allow yourself to be knocked down and stay down, or you can climb right back up and try again. It is in your control who you want to be, what your next move is and whether you are happy or not. don't forget you are worth having everything you love. Love yourself. Be not faithless, but believing. -John 20:27 From the inscription on the grave- Love one another as I have loved you, -John 15:12
Thank you Daddy for the memories, for bringing me to this earth to make a difference and for helping me to keep BELIEVING that I have a purpose. Happy 20th Birthday in Heaven. I carry this card with me every where I go as a constant reminder that if I just be myself, I can be and do anything I set my heart out for, because I am loved.
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