So I thought I would be writing my next blog after coming off a roller coaster weekend... about my weekend. (until I experienced today) The first trip to our cabin in 6 months, the first trip since Steve died, a birthday weekend for my mom and Steve.... and all the emotions lying in between. It started with dogs breaking then licking clean a glass jar of nacho cheese, glass and blood everywhere, 2 calls to emergency vets, bleeding mouths and noses and a loaf of bread later... safe to say they both seem fine now! THANK GOD! I don't think another loss right now would be manageable. A 12 year old's mental breakdown afraid he may loose a dog, or two to swallowed glass, UGH! What a stressor. We all survived. We experienced some crying a lot of laughter, good company, some sledding and lots of fun playing games. In all it turned out to be as good as a weekend as expected given the circumstances.
On to being back home, school, work, laundry, household chores, life.... A class at my office that no one showed up for which ended up in Michelle and I taking down Christmas décor putting up Valentine's and scoping out an upcoming great opportunity... details later if it works out... and me driving all the way to Scottsdale to decorate a table that I sponsored for today's Women of Strength Event. Getting home at 7 pm, and missing Paxton's speed and agility class! Still trying to get the hang of this single mom thing.
I have been to this event in the past, but this is the first year that I actually sponsored a whole table of ten women, coming together to be inspired by other women. These women's stories that are guest speakers are so inspiring, uplifting, powerful and amazing, tear jerking for sure and I was super excited to be such a part of this event. They sure remind me to be grateful.
When I arrived to decorate yesterday the first thing I thought of when looking upon some of the tables decorated already is that my intent was way too simple for some of these extravagant table themes. I was sort of embarrassed at first. All I can say is WOW. I quickly realized that just like grieving, everyone's decorating skills vary and to different degrees. So although I may have felt my table was less extravagant then others, it was not inferior. As Women of Strength none of us should be judging others anyway. Women of Strength celebrate other women, are the first to be excited for their good news and are their biggest cheerleaders. In an industry of hot competition, my motto has always been, you gain more success, by helping others succeed! I have never been a secret keeper and have given my secrets away when asked how I got to where I am. I am not sure they are secrets, as much as trial and error and what worked and didn't work for me in my path to where I am now. I have always had time for a cup of coffee or lunch when I have had someone ask to pick my brain and that is the way it should be. There is plenty of business to go around and you have to realize that not everyone is the right client or agent for one another. And that is OK.
I proceeded to decorate my table just as I had intended, only running to Hobby Lobby for some ribbon to tie my table guests gifts together at their place setting to give it a more finished look, and borrowing a little glitter from a neighboring table friend. Satisfied with my finished project I left and made the hour trip home. And I received lots of compliments... sometimes I think our inferiority is also just in our head.
I was super excited to hear what the guest speakers had to say and decided to text all my guests and tell them that I was grateful that they would attend and be able to be inspired by these women and that I was confident that they would each take home something that they needed to hear the next day. And because I have attended these sessions before I made sure to tell everyone if it was an option, choose your waterproof mascara! I am a firm believer that sometimes God puts you in the right place at the right time to hear what he needs you to. Not everyone probably took the same message from the two lovely ladies who spoke, but they took away what they needed to justify giving up 3 hours of their day to be there and accompany me and listen with intent, besides taking home cool gifts. Both stories were very powerful and I would love to share them with you however this space is definitely not long enough for their messages to be effective. If you are interested in hearing what I received from their motivational talks, feel free to call me because I am inspired enough to tell you all about it, and more than happy to share. I could tell you stories about boxes that you could relate to.
I was super excited to see old friends and business acquaintances that I hadn't seen in awhile and the attendance of about 485 women and 15 men! The most exciting part and the to this minute still unbelievable but awesome honor was to have a paragraph read about your presence lighting up a room, always having a smile on your face, being there for those around you, always knowing what someone needs, being the first to offer help, being a positive influence, a good mentor and an amazing leader and then having your name called as a recognized influential women in your industry... leaving you speechless... literally, I had no idea what I said, but I know it wasn't very inspiring... lol - and I will tell you that is when you know you are a writer and not a speaker, and then put on the spot is not a good place to be, because I was shaking and had absolutely no idea what to say. It was so unexpected that I didn't have a second thought, was not able to write it down ahead of time and had no right words to express my gratitude, because it was taking forever to sink in that my name was actually called. To be honored, loved, respected and thought of in such a high regard is probably one of the most awesome compliments you can receive especially in a room of 500 people! Wow! I am seriously still dumbfounded, but very appreciative.
I have always felt like my calling in life is to serve others. I wake up in the mornings to ask God to send me the people he needs me to help the most, they are not always paid clients. Through the people I meet and the experiences I have I look for a way to find the right connection and to know when to reach out to people when they need it the most. I love to give back and I love to just give. One of the men today said it best, that when God gives us shoulder taps (that little voice urging us to call, connect or reach out to someone whether we know them or they are a stranger) we should listen to that and act upon it. Connection is powerful. I try to be a good friend and someone who can tune into situations and circumstances, feelings and read others needs. Sometimes it is just a text of hello, kind words, or encouragement, sometimes it is helping someone figure out a solution to a problem, sometimes it is giving a different perspective on a situation at hand, sometimes it is mentoring them through a deal, noticing when something is off and reaching out to see if I can help, lending a listening ear, helping a client connect with a new home or land, or bringing 2 people together that one needs a service. I have been called a connector, a mentor, a leader in the past, but being recognized for doing what I do just because that is who I am, is truly an honor! And what a beautiful gift I received, what women could refuse something in a Tiffany box.
I thank all of the people who nominated me, who see me for who I am, who have supported me when I needed it the most over the past few months of these difficult times and for seeing the best in me over the worst, the good in me over the bad, and the sparkle over the flaws, the smile over the tears. The professional over the hot mess. I truly feel that I am my best when I put others first, when I lead by a good example and when God sends me the people who need to be in my life at just the right time whether it is helping them or me, his divine set up justifies my efforts to make others feel His presence and His love.
Although I know that I am not the same person I was 6 months ago and I never will be again, as I lost a huge part of myself, not all of me is gone, and the best parts are here to remain, with some minor changes allowing me the flexibility for a little more self-care, including the strength to say no to the things I don't want to do, or don't enjoy, and prioritizing my list to include more actual presence in the things I do at hand, especially with Paxton. Saying yes all the time and multi-tasking can sure have its benefits but it is often filled with many flaws. My challenge to myself this year is to have more confidence in myself, my abilities and capabilities, and who I am as a Women of Strength, because honestly after today I have a standard to live up to, if not exceed, and I am not about to disappoint.
And Blessed is she who believed there would be a fulfillment of what was spoken to her by the Lord. Luke 1:45
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